Compulsive Love
by Goth Albino Angel
Summary: Lissa's in love with Rose, but when Rose doesn't return her feelings, will Lissa recede into herself and let her alterego, the secretly sadistic Vasilisa, take over? How can Rose stop this new monster from ruining her life?
1. Chapter 1

Vampire Academy isn't owned by me. Richelle Mead wrote it. Take it up with her.

* * *

**Lissa POV**

_Where could Rose be?_ I was so excited. I had finally talked to Christian about our relationship and he told me that he was happy for me. He told me he sensed my feelings and that he wanted me to be happy.

So now, I was moving through the trees looking for Rose. I knew Dimitri had brought her out this way. I was just hoping she wasn't still wild because I really couldn't wait to tell her. I was really nervous as to what she would say. I would be lucky if she didn't already know how I felt, but I kept pushing onward. I arrived at the cottage that used to belong to the guard dhampirs before the protection barriers were up. I took a guess and figured that's where Dimitri had taken Rose since the lights were on.

I walked over and passed by a window. There was a very strange feeling in my stomach as I peeked in to see if Rose was alright. I couldn't believe what I saw. Clothes were scattered all over the floor and two figures were moving on the bed. I recognized Rose immediately and felt the betrayal wash through me. I stared for a moment longer and Rose caught my eye.

I heard her whisper, "Lissa?" but I couldn't understand what was happening. That is, until the other person turned around and I saw that it was Guardian Belikov. I was in utter shock that they were together.

I shook my head and turned away, running back toward the Academy. Tears streamed down my cheeks as I raced to my room. I fell onto my bed and sobbed. _This can't be happening!_ I screamed to myself. _This can't be happening!_

After all this time, why hadn't I seen it? Why hadn't I known? She could have at least told me; I'm supposed to be her best friend. I curled up on my bed and stayed that way. I felt dead; I couldn't move and it hurt to breathe.

_She's in love with someone else,_ was all I could process. I was stupid to think she could ever love me; what am I compared to a strong, muscular, sun-walking GUY? I was nothing compared to that. I wasn't strong, I couldn't walk in the sun without getting my eyes hurt and I certainly wasn't a guy. I should have known she didn't love me, but I couldn't stop hoping that maybe she would.

Now I was lost in my own despair and I wasn't coming out any time soon.

_**Rose POV**_

Oh my God, Lissa had seen us! She had seen Dimitri and me having sex together! She had run off toward the academy! What if she was going to go tell? What would I do then? They would surely take Dimitri away from me.

I had to go after her. But Dimitri was so inviting. Ah, hell. Whatever happens, I love him and only him. Hours later, we were still together and no one had come to get us so I assumed Lissa hadn't told. But what was with the hasty leave? I had to go talk to her.

I slowly sat up and kissed Dmitri goodbye as I put my clothes back on and headed up to the academy. I went to the Moroii dorm and up to Lissa's room. Knocking softly, no reply met my ears. I quirked an eyebrow and was turning to leave when sniffles sounded from the other side of the door. I knocked again, but was once again, met with no answer.

I sighed and slowly opened the bond. Lissa was most definitely in her room and she was curled up in a fetal position. _My eyes hurt_. **Wait, why did Lissa's eyes hurt.**

Then there was a flash of a memory—it was me with Dimitri—and Lissa broke down into silent tears, making sure to keep everything quiet and muffled so that whoever was on the other side of the door couldn't hear her._Rose, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't be acting like this; I should be happy you found happiness, even if I never will now_.

Lissa slowly lifted her head and looked to the door. _They must be gone by now_. Her head dropped back to the pillows and something cold welcomed her. Looking down, Lissa saw the knife she hid under her pillow in case of danger.

Reaching out, Lissa cradled it in her hands and I gasped silently as she slowly raised it to eyelevel. But I was worrying for nothing; she lay it back down on her pillow and stared at it speculatively. _It's a weapon people use to kill others, but I don't wish to kill Rose or Guardian Belikov; it's not their fault I'm not happy. It's my fault. I waited too long; now I can't have my happiness. Oh Rose, why did you choose him? Why couldn't you have chosen me? I know I'm nothing compared to him, but you're my best friend… and I love you_.

More tears cascaded down Lissa's cheeks as her sobs were renewed. I pulled back into my own mind and stared at Lissa's bedroom door in shock.

**She loves me?** I thought. **Since when?**

I gathered my courage and twisted the doorknob until the lock broke, entering the room slowly. "Liss?" I called.

Lissa's sobs stopped immediately and she put on a smile for me. "Hey, Rose." She said softly. "What's up? I'm sorry if I interrupted you and Guardian Belikov. I promise it won't happen again."

I shook my head. "Nah, it's fine. So, um, why were you out that way anyway. I mean, when I left you I was a lunatic remember?"

"Well, yeah, but I was just coming to tell you that I l-left Christian." I raised an eyebrow and she ducked her head to avoid my gaze. "It was mutual. We could both sense that something was amiss in the relationship and so w-we broke it off."

I knew instantly from her expression that something was wrong and even if I hadn't gone into her mind, I would have known she was hiding something from me. I lifted her chin to look at me and I felt a rush of warmth come through the bond. **She must have fallen for me hard.**

"Liss, I know there's more to it. Just tell me."

Lissa shook her head and I raised an eyebrow. Lissa had always told me when something was wrong. I stared into her eyes and surveyed the emotion in them. I could clearly see the love in them, but the betrayal was flooding through the bond in huge waves and I only felt a small hint of guilt for being the one that put it there.

"Please Liss?" I whispered, using her love for me as a manipulative. I felt her expression crumple sadly and she buried her head in my chest, hard sobs racking her thin frame.

"I'm sorry!" she wailed. "I'm sorry for everything. For not being happy for you and not being straight and-."

I put a finger to her lips and quirked an eyebrow. "Please get to the point, I'm getting confused."

Lissa nodded and took a deep breath before looking at me. Tears began forming again as she said, "Rose, I… I was c-coming to tell you that I-I l-love you." She turned her eyes downward and I felt rejection come through the bond.

I lifted her chin to make her look at me and said, "Liss, you're my best friend. I'll always love you first, alright?" She nodded, tears flowing down her cheeks as she realized I would only love her as a best friend.

"I'm sorry Lissa." Lissa merely nodded and I let go of her chin. She watched sadly as I walked out of her room.


	2. Chapter 2

Vampire Academy

**_Chapter two_**

**_Lissa POV_**

I knew it.

I knew she could never love me the way I loved her, but some stubborn part of me thought she could. Why do I always get my hopes up only for someone to crush them? I should never even have thought it because she loves him.

I lay back down and began crying again, soon I would have no more tears left, but I didn't care because all of these tears were for Rose. Anything for Rose.

At last, I sat up and walked over to my dresser, picking up the picture of my family. Poor Andre, mother, father… they're all gone and Rose is all I have left. Rose WAS all I had left, now she's deserted me too. She knows that true love comes before friend love; Dimitri will always be higher in her heart than me.

_Why? Why did I have to love her? Why did I have to bond with her? Why did I have to meet her? This would never have happened had I not sat next to her in kindergarten._

I sighed, knowing it would never do me any good to mope around so I decided to try and sleep it off. Laying back in the bed, I slowly drifted to sleep.

**Rose POV**

I stretched as I woke up and felt that something was very wrong. Probing the bond, I found no emotion, or at least not any strong ones. They were all dulled and I decided to go check on Lissa to make sure she was alright. Knocking on her door, I waited for it to open and when it did, I couldn't help but stare at my best friend. She had on a gown that matched her green eyes and a small diamond studded necklace wrapped snugly around her neck.

"Good morning, Guardian Hathaway." Lissa said in a cheerful voice.

I felt a shock course through me and asked, "What?"

Lissa's smile shrank a bit. "Are you feeling alright, Rosemarie? You look a bit flushed. Perhaps you should go to the medical ward?"

I stared at her and wondered what was going on. "Who are you and what have you done with Lissa?"

Lissa's features changed to one of disapproval. "Guardian Hathaway, you know I hate that nickname. Please call me Vasilisa since you are to be my guardian soon."

I cocked my head to the side, glanced around and pushed her into her room, shutting the door behind me. "Ok, Liss, what's up?" I demanded softly. "I've called you Lissa ever since kindergarten because I could never pronounce your name. And you hate your full name anyway, you always tell people to call you Lissa. What's up with the joke?"

Lissa stared at me in confusion for a long moment. "I'm not sure what you are talking about Rosemarie. I've always hated my nickname. I don't believe there is a joke going on and if there is then I certainly am not a part of it. Perhaps Guardian Belikov can help us?"

I shook my head to clear my thoughts as a million questions coursed through me. "Wha- You know what? Let's go talk to Christian. He'll sort this out."

"Oh, yes, Prince Ozera will certainly know the answer."

Lissa's smile widened as I led her out the door and I shot her an odd look. I knocked on Christian's door and he answered with bleary eyes. "What do you want Rose?" He demanded sleepily.

"Something's wrong with Lissa-."

"Vasilisa." Lissa hissed softly.

I looked back at her in shock for moment before filing this away for later. "Something's wrong with VASILISA. She's not herself."

Christian motioned for us to come inside and we took a seat near his bed. "Ok, so what you're saying is Lissa-."

"Vasilisa!" Lissa snarled at him.

He looked taken aback for a moment before nodding. "What you're saying is Vasilisa isn't herself. Hey, Vasilisa, I thought you hated that name? You always tell us to call you Lissa. Why'd you change your mind?"

"I've always loved my full name and have always hated my nickname. I thought I told you all that when I first met you?" We shook our heads. "Ah, well. You know now. Come Guardian Hathaway, we must find Guardian Belikov. Have a good day Prince Ozera."

She strode elegantly out the door and I stared after her.

"What did you do?" Christian hissed.

"All I did was tell her that I couldn't love her the way she loves me!" I hissed at him.

Christian raised an eyebrow as a smirk appeared on his lips. "Never thought you'd be the one to break her heart." He told me.

"Shut up." I muttered to him as I followed my best friend. Lissa moved through the hallways almost effortlessly and it took me a moment to realize that she looked like real royalty, rather than a small portion of the royal family. I followed behind her as we walked through the school, heading to our classes. Lissa was her normal self, but her emotions were still dimmed and she seemed to have an underlying current of annoyance in her. I seemed to be the only one to pick up on it though.

Then, a new Moroi who obviously thought she could make something of herself fast by insulting as many people as possible, walked up to Lissa and said, "Seriously? Where did you get that dress? It looks like something from the 1700s. Get with the century change." I was about to move forward and kick her Moroi ass when Lissa surprised everyone in the hall and me by leaning close to the girl and glaring into her eyes.

"It would do you well not to address a member of the Dragomir family as such, new girl." She snarled lowly, making the other girl shiver. "There are far worse things in the world than Strigoii and I can personally introduce you to them if you dare to insult me again. One of them, just so happens to be my guardian-to-be, so be careful." With that Lissa huffed and stormed off.

Everyone in the hall stared after her in utter shock and that's when it hit me. **This isn't my best friend, that's not Lissa.**


	3. Chapter 3

Vampire Academy

Chapter three

**Lissa's POV**

I was falling. I was in a never-ending pit of darkness so black I was surprised I was still alive.

_How am I functioning?_ I asked myself quietly.

"I've taken over to ensure you live." A voice that sounded a lot like mine said nearby.

_Who's there?_ I asked.

"I am Vasilisa, your alter-ego counterpart."

I shivered slightly. _I hate that name_. I said quietly.

"So your friends have told me more than once. As it is, I hate that nickname. So we're pretty much even. Now, why are you so depressed young one?"

_Rose_… I closed my eyes. _Rose doesn't_… I couldn't finish, couldn't bring myself to even think the word that had caused me so much pain.

"She doesn't love you?" The voice was gentle but the words stung harder than if Rose herself had said them. "Don't worry, then. I will ensure she suffers for what she's done to us and by the time you're ready to come out again, she will be yours."

I could feel myself falling deeper into the darkness and hoped Vasilisa was right.

**Vasilisa's POV**

_So Rosemarie thought that she didn't love Lissa_ (I shivered at the name, but pushed it aside), _but why?_ _What could Rosemarie have said or done that would make Lissa so depressed she was drowning in her own despair?_

I turned a corner and instantly found out. Rosemarie and Guardian Belikov were kissing each other tenderly, moving apart when the kiss ended and smiling at each other. My bond with Rosemarie wasn't as strong as the one she shared with Lissa and for that I was grateful because the anger I was feeling was almost palpable. I turned on my heel and stormed back to my dormitory room.

"How dare she even **think** about someone else when Lissa was right there the entire time?" I hissed. "Rosemarie, you've made the biggest mistake of your life. You will suffer, no matter what, I swear it."

I waited for a small bit before moving out into the sunlight. Most students were sleeping by this time and so I would go unnoticed for the most part. Making my way swiftly to the dhampir dormitory, I stopped at Rosemarie's room and, using my nail to pick the lock, quietly crept inside.

Searching through the pictures in her desk drawer of her and Lissa, I came across one of the two of them as well as Prince Ozera, Guardian Belikov and a woman that looked oddly familiar. I looked between her and Prince Ozera and it came to me: she was his aunt, Natasha. And if what I gather from Lissa's memories is true, then she and Guardian Belikov used to date. A smile moved across my face as a plan slowly formed in my head.

Just then, I heard the door opening and quickly rearranged my face so as to look caught in a headlight. Rosemarie looked in and noticed me, looking at me in confusion. I smiled sheepishly at her and my eyes were 'drawn' back to the picture. "Hey Lis- I mean, Vasilisa, what's up?"

"Nothing," I replied softly, still looking down at the photo.

Rosemarie glanced at it over my shoulder and chuckled. "Yeah, that was a great day, and Tasha was so nice."

I nodded and replaced the picture before standing.

"So, what were you doing in here, anyway?" Rosemarie asked, eyeing me intently from where she sat on her bed.

"I just wanted to look at some old pictures," I said to her. "My memory is a bit foggy and I wished to freshen it. My apologies for going through your belongings."

"No big," she said, waving her hand. "But you should probably get some sleep. The sun is up and all."

I nodded and made my way back to the Moroii dormitory. A plan was forming in my head and I knew that it would work. I knew it would.


	4. Chapter 4

Vampire Academy

Chapter four

**Rose's POV**

That was weird. I mean, everything that's happened has been weird, but that was really weird. Lissa had perfect memory. She could even remember her first birthday. I decided to take a closer look into what she was doing and picked the picture back up. I frowned at Tasha because her hand lay softly on Dimitr's, but his arm was around me and mine was around Lissa's waist. Maybe that had been what she was looking at, my arms on her and Dimitri's arms on me. I must have broken her heart pretty badly.

**But how did she get into my room?** The door, of course was still locked when I got back, but the window was locked as well. **Maybe she really is a lock pick.** Either way, she must be lonely now that she broke up with Christian and I didn't return her feelings. **Maybe she needed someone else to love her**. I sighed, knowing this would be hard.

The next day, Christian, Lissa (I only called her Vasilisa to her face), Dimitri and I were sitting in one of the lounges when there was the sound of someone talking. We all looked up and I ground my teeth at seeing Tasha Ozera strolling toward us.

"Hey guys," she said casually as she sat down next to her nephew.

"Hey Aunt Tasha, what, uh, what are you doing here?"

"Well, I got a call from an old friend yesterday telling me that I should come up because he had something to tell me." She glanced over at Dimitri with a flutter of her eyelashes and I glanced up at Dimitri to see him smiling back.

"Hey Tasha, I need to tell you in private."

She nodded and walked passed me, swaying her hips as she followed my secret lover. I growled low in my throat as I watched them go. Lissa took up Dimitri's seat as they left and leaned her head on my shoulder. I felt a small bit of warmth come through the bond, but it was really faint and I looked at my best friend. She had her eyes closed and seemed to be breathing deeply; I assumed she was asleep until her hand tightened on mine and I watched her gaze flit to the two adults. I followed her gaze to see Dimitri kissing Tasha softly. She grinned at him and I felt my heart sink.

**Was he serious?**

As I felt my heart break, I slowly stood and walked as fast as I could back to my dorm room.

**Vasilisa's POV**

I watched Rosemarie run out of the room and nodded in grim satisfaction. The first phase was complete. I felt her betrayal come through the bond and assumed that she and Lissa never realized that the bond was actually two-sided. I would tell them when this was over. For now, I will sit back and watch as my plan slowly moves into action. Thankfully, a little known fact about the Dragomir family is that we are the strongest compulsion experts in the Moroii world.

As I watched Dimitri and Natasha talk some more, I compelled him to kiss her again. He did so and I smiled, my plan can't fail as long as Dimitri was within the vicinity of my wavelengths. I didn't have to use my eyes to compel someone to do what I wanted. I guess it was another bonus of being a spirit elemental. As Christian and I continued to watch the movie, I looked through Rosemarie's eyes and found her crying silently in her dormitory room. I slowly stood and pecked Prince Ozera on the cheek before gliding out of the room, something both my alterego and I did very well.

I slowly knocked on Rosemarie's door and heard a small "yes?"

"Rosemarie?" I called softly. "Are you alright?"

"Go away." It was a growl and I felt the wave of distrust come off her. "You're not my best friend; you're just some weird substitute. I don't want to speak with anyone right now."

I slowly reached down to the knob and used my nail to pick it. Opening the door, I slowly crept inside and sat next to Rosemarie's crying form. "Rosemarie, please, tell me what has you so upset."

Rosemarie slowly sat up and sniffed. "He kissed Tasha, right in front of me. Does that make me worthless in his eyes? Am I just a toy to be played with to him? Liss, I love him and he obviously lied to me about being loved."

Just then, I felt Dimitri and Natasha enter the wavelength boundary and began compelling Dimitri once more. I heard him tell Natasha to wait outside and knocked on the door.

"Yeah?" Rosemarie called, her head now on my shoulder as she wiped her tears.

Dimitri strode in and stood before Rosemarie and me. I made him fidget slightly before sighing. "Rose, I made a bad decision when I had sex with you. I shouldn't have done that, knowing my heart was somewhere else. I only ask that you forgive me for using you like that and I'm truly sorry."

As he and Natasha left, I heard Rosemarie break down in sobs, making me smile at the hurt she felt. _It serves her right for doing what she did to Lissa._ After several moments of crying, Rosemarie finally pulled away and looked up at me.

"Liss, what do I do?" I shrugged putting on an air of indifference, knowing that if I were to comfort her, then my plan would fail.

"Please, Liss, I really need your help with this. Please, help me." I stared at her nonchalantly and she grabbed my shoulders.

"Say something!" she yelled, shaking me slightly. I winced, conveying that she'd caused me pain even though she hadn't and she quickly let go.

"Liss, please." Rosemarie's tears were coming back, but I merely stared at her. "You know what, fine! Get out!."

I stood and left the room, a small smile gracing my lips as I headed to my own dormitory room. Perfect.


	5. Chapter 5

Vampire Academy

Chapter five

Rose POV

**How could she just sit there and say nothing? She always had comforting words to say to me! Now, it's like she's a whole different person and she doesn't care about me anymore.** I was still crying, but the sobbing had subsided a bit.

"What have I done to deserve this?" I demanded of myself.

A picture of me and Dimitri having sex flashed into my head, but I quickly pushed it away only for it to be replaced with Lissa's tearstained, heartbroken face. I sighed. I knew I broke my best friend's heart, but I don't love her the way she does me. I can't help that. Besides, it's not like she can't live without me. She's obviously still living, so why is she acting so cold toward me? I've upset her before and she was still there with a comforting hand when I needed it. **Maybe I went too far this time?** No, even if I had overstepped a boundary, Lissa would still come to my aide.

**What could be going on with her now?**

Just as I was pondering what could have happened, I heard screams rent the air. Jumping up, I raced outside and found the campus grounds being overrun with Strigoi. I immediately reached for the small stake I kept at my hip since Mason's death and began swinging left and right. Just then, I heard Lissa's scream and hurried in that direction. She must have been on her way to the Moroi dorm when the Strigoi invaded. I mentally slapped myself for getting angry at her.

I saw a large Strigoi sneering at Lissa as he backed her against the wall. My best friend looked terrified as the undead monster bore down on her. "Liss!" I screamed, running as fast as I could toward her.

Then, I heard Dimitri's scream as well. Another large Strigoi right across from Lissa was holding him. I looked back and forth between the two, panic finally setting in. **What the hell do I do?** I could save my best friend, but lose the man I love or I could save the man I love and endanger not only my best friend, but also the last remaining member of the Dragomir family.

"Aw shit!" I said through gritted teeth.

"Rose!" Dimitri shouted. "Stake him! Free me so I can continue the fight."

I looked at him then turned to Lissa to see her staring at me sadly. She didn't even say anything to me as she stared. I felt something in the dulled bond. Was that… defeat? Lissa never admitted defeat; she was always strong through the entire thing. My eyes widened in horror as my best friend set her jaw and took a slow step toward the killing machine bearing down on her.

"No!" I screamed as the Strigoi snatched Lissa and bit into her throat, lapping at the blood she willingly gave him. Dimitri's struggles doubled and he managed to throw his Strigoi off and stake it as I rushed forward to help Lissa. Quickly staking the Strigoi in the back, I pulled Lissa away and cradled her against me.

"Liss?" I asked. She didn't respond, her eyes staring at nothing. "Lissa? Lissa please! Please, answer me!"

There was the barest flicker of an eyelid as Lissa slowly stirred. "R-Rosemarie?" she mumbled hoarsely.

"Lissa, oh Lissa! Thank God you're alright. Oh I'm sorry, so sorry, for what I did to you. I promise I'll be there for you no matter what. Even if I do love Dimitri, you're my best friend, Lissa. I can't lose you."

Lissa's eyes filled with tears and at first I thought they were happy tears. But then, she pushed me away and moved as far away from me as she could. "I can't believe this!" she muttered to herself as she cried. "She should have just let me die. What person puts their best friend through this? I should just go kill myself now, before she stops me from doing that."

I was in shock as I watched Lissa moved stealthily away from me. I glanced around and saw Dimitri nowhere in sight. He must have taken off back into the battle, without even checking to make sure Lissa and I were safe. I gritted my teeth and went after my best friend. I found her in her dorm room just about to slit her wrist. I charged in and tackled her, effectively making her fling the knife somewhere else.

"Rosemarie!" Lissa shouted at me. "What are you doing? I was about to be out of your hair altogether. It's obvious you favor Guardian Belikov more so why not let me continue in order for me to be gone for good and you can spend all your efforts on him."

I stared at her in shock at seeing more tears pour down her cheeks at this outburst. "Liss, did you not hear what I said out there? I said I couldn't lose you!"

"Why not?" Lissa demanded. "Why am I so important? You don't love me and the more you say you love Guardian Belikov the more pain I suffer so why not let me do us both a favor, Rosemarie?"

I planted my feet and crossed my arms. "No." I said. "I'm not going to let you kill yourself."

"Why not?" Lissa demanded.

"Because I can't lose you." I repeated once more through gritted teeth.

"Why not?" Lissa repeated.

"Because you're my best friend and if you were to die, I don't know what I'd do. I mean you comfort me, you always know when something's wrong. You've been there for me through everything. I swear if you were a guy, I'd have married you by now, but-."

Just then I realized what I had said and looked quickly to Lissa. Her face was blank as she stared at me. I couldn't feel anything through the bond and it was scaring me. "Liss?" I said slowly.

She shook her head and turned away from me. "Leave me alone and stay away from me, Rosemarie."

I was in shock. Again. "W-what?" I asked.

"Stay away from me. I want nothing to do with you anymore."

I stared at my best friend, sure she was joking, but when Lissa neither turned around nor continued to acknowledge my presence, I hung my head and left her room, heading to my own to mope.

Vasilisa POV

"How dare she say such a thing?" I roared as soon as I felt Rosemarie leave my wavelengths. "If I were male? If I were male, then I wouldn't be her best friend. This is an outrage! You know what? It's time for the final phase of the plan."

Moving out of my dormitory room, I slowly made my way over to the higher part of the Moroi dormitory and knocked on Natasha Ozera's door. She opened it after a few seconds and smiled at me. I immediately could tell it was fake and I surveyed her own mind wavelengths.

She thought I was here on behalf of Rosemarie. _Well, that was **part** of it._

I smiled shyly as I said, "Guardian Belikov wishes to speak with you. He is in the courtyard right now, since the Strigoi have been defeated."

Natasha's smile turned genuine as she followed me out to the courtyard. I stood in front of Guardian Belikov as he and Natasha spoke for a moment. Then, I heard her jump for joy and knew that the plan had fallen into action.

"Of course I'll marry you, Guardian Belikov." Natasha gushed.

All of the Guardians and students around clapped enthusiastically at this new development and I felt Rosemarie's despair deepen. I watched the newly engaged couple for a moment before moving away. I knew Rosemarie was watching so I put a frown on my face as though I was sad at this new development. In actuality, of course, I was jumping for joy at how well the plan was going. There had been a few snags of course, but now, there was nothing Rosemarie could do about her sweet Dimitri. I went back to my dormitory room and fell onto the bed, letting sleep claim me.


	6. Chapter 6

Vampire Academy

Chapter six

Rose POV

Something was totally wrong with Lissa now.Maybe she was possessed or something because she had never basically told me that she didn't want to see me ever again. I can't believe she felt like that and then to have Dimitri propose to Tasha… my life must be fucked up for real.

**How did this go wrong?**

This is just so weird. I felt really alone now that Lissa didn't want me around and Dimitri didn't care about me. It's like I was wiped off the face of the earth. The only thing I can really do now is just sit and think. **How did all this start?** Kindergarten. Definitely then, because that's when Lissa and I first met.

I had gotten us both in trouble by calling the teacher a psychotic bitch. Of course, he deserved it for making me stand up in front of class and try to tell everyone where I was from and who my parents were. Lissa was the only one that stood up for me and so I got us both in trouble. Ever since then, we had been stuck to each other like glue and yet, I never even noticed her growing love for me. But now that I look back, I see it.

It was there even before her family died. She had loved me even before she lost everyone important to her. As I looked back through time, I watched as Lissa developed into who she was before all this happened. She was strong, smart, graceful and amazingly beautiful. She's all that now, but instead of a kind, compassionate nature, she's taken on a cold, nonchalant, impassive one. I must have hurt her relly badly if I could dull all her moods and make her completely change her entire demeanor.

Actually, now I think about it, she only changed her demeanor around me and Christian. Everyone else hasn't seen this side of Lissa. It makes me wonder how long she's been acting the part of perfect princess. I can't believe I didn't see it; even with the bond, I never knew that she was irritated beyond belief with all of the things people said about her or did behind her back. She must have always known because even now, I can feel unhappiness through the bond. I hadn't even felt one shred of true love when she was with Christian; it was always forced love, as if she thought she HAD to be with someone else of the royal family.

Now it was my turn to really think on what lissa meant to me. **Did I truly love Dimitri?** My first answer was yes, of course, but then I stopped and thought about it. Exactly what did I love about him? His looks, his accent…

That's where it stopped. Other than the way he looked and his accent, there was nothing else, attracting me to Dimitri. But with Lissa, it wasn't just her beautiful platinum blonde hair or amazing jade green eyes, but her smile and the way she laughed. How she was always nice to everyone and how even though she was really fragile she put on a bold face for everyone around her because she had to. She was the last remaining Dragomir. Lissa was always there to help someone if she thought they needed it and she was the one to comfort me over losing Mason.

I can't believe all the pain I've put her through, there's so much to love about her and yet, I don't love her.

**Or do I?**

I dug deeper, deeper than the memories of everything and went all the way back to kindergarten again. There had been something about Lissa that made me want to protect her, make her my best friend, my Guarded, mine. My eyes flew open as I came to a shocking revelation… I DID love Lissa. I love her from the very bottom of my heart. **How did I not see this?** I had to go tell her before she attempted to commit suicide again.

Running to the Moroi dorm, which was where I saw her walk off to after Dimitri proposed to Tasha, I was just getting to the doors when I heard a whooshing sound and someone fell into my arms. I glanced down and found that it was none other than the person I was coming to see. "Liss?" I gasped. "You didn't try suicide again, did you?"

She nodded sadly. "Liss, please, I have something tot ell you and I really need you to listen to me."

I looked deep into the jade green eyes that I now realized were my favorite color and said slowly. "Lissa, I was wrong. I do love you. I thought about it, I thought long and hard and I realized that I can lose Dimitri a thousand times over, but I can't lose you even once or I might die. Please, Lissa you have to believe me."

Lissa cocked her head to the side and was about to say something when a Strigoi that must have been hiding for awhile jumped out and bit at Lissa's throat. I gasped in horror and socked him a good one in the jaw, effectively pushing him into the sunlight of the oncoming dawn, where he easily burned to a crisp. I turned back to my fallen best friend and found her with her eyes closed.

"Lissa?" I asked. Just as before, I received no answer. "Lissa please. Come on, you have to wake up. You have to. You can't be dead. I need you, I love you. Please!"

I buried my face in her hair as I cried and shouted her name. Then, all of a sudden, I felt a twitch and I pulled back to see Lissa slowly opening her eyes.

"Rose?" she asked.

"Yes, Lissa, it's me. I'm here and I promise, I'm never leaving."

"Rose, I'm tired, can we go up to the dorms to sleep?"

"Sure, love, I- wait, what did you just call me?"

"Rose?" Lissa inquired. "Unless you want me to call you by your full name…"

"No, no, Rose is fine. It's great, it's amazing. Just like you. It's good to have you back Lissa. I missed you so much. It wasn't until you said you never wanted to see me again that I realized I couldn't be without you. I'm sorry for what I put you through Lissa. Please forgive me?"

Lissa hung her head and I saw tears leaking out of her eyes.

"Lissa what's wrong?"

"I lied to you," she said softly. "About everything."

"You mean you don't really love me?" I asked, my heart sinking.

"No, I do Rose. With everything I am, I love you, but… I'll explain it in our dorm room. Come on."

**_Lissa POV_**

I was extremely nervous. _What if Rose hated me for this? What would I do then?_ I took a deep breath and said as fast as I could, "Vasilisa is my alterego and she did everything. She compelled Dimitri to kiss Tasha and break up with you and propose to Tasha and everything. She compelled the Strigoi holding Dimitri to just hold him while she compelled Dimitri to struggle feebly. She compelled my Strigoi to wait until she took a step forward before moving in for the kill. She could feel your emotions and she's the one who made you so unhappy. Rose, I'm so sorry, please, please , please forgive me. I never meant to hurt you, honest, but I needed your love because I was drowning in my own despair. Please forgive me?" I looked at her fearfully and was surprised when she got up and pulled me into a hug.

"Don't sweat over it Lissa." She told me softly rubbing soothingly circles in my back. "I'm kinda pissed that I got played so easily, but I'm glad all the same because otherwise, I would have spent the rest of my life unhappy with someone I thought I was happy with. So don't worry, Lissa. I love you and that's all we need alright?"

I could tell from the bond that she was speaking the truth and I grinned up at her, pulling her into a kiss. "Ok, Rose. Thank you."

She let me lean my head on her shoulder for a bit before laying us on the bed and stroking my hair. We fell into a content sleep and I must say, I had never felt better in my entire life than in that moment when Rose whispered, just before I went to sleep, "I love you Vasilisa Sabine Rhea Dragomir."


	7. Tasha and Dimitri's future

Tasha and Dimitri

Tasha moved slowly through the house as she tried not to bump her stomach into anything. She was excited that the baby would be coming soon and Dimitri had been hard at work on the nursery. She slowly made breakfast as her husband came down and sat at the table.

"How do you feel today, Tasha?" he asked.

"I can feel Emili kicking, Dimitri. I'm so excited she's coming soon. How's the nursery look since you won't let me see it?"

Dimitri smiled in self-pride. "Wonderful. You'll love it, I promise."

Tasha grinned as she brought over an omelet and some pancakes. Sitting down, she glanced over at her husband and saw him eating slowly as though deep in thought.

"What are you thinking of, love?" she asked softly.

"Whether the baby will be a tomboy or a girly girl so that I know when to have the talk about boys to her."

Tasha laughed softly and patted his hand. "Don't worry Darling. She'll be just like her daddy, knowing boys are bad until you get out of school."

Dimitri grinned. "She had better, or she may get some boys hurt, Moroi or other. Her daddy is the Guardian of a royal Moroi and her mother. Any boy that gets too close to my little girl had better be a Moroi because a dhampir isn't going to break my baby's heart."

"Dimitri, you sound so protective. I like it, it's so sweet that you care so strongly for your baby."

Dimitri shrugged. "Come on, how could I not care a lot for my own baby girl? She's part of the family even though she's not born. And she'll be spoiled too." He chuckled.

"How do you think Rose and Lissa are doing in their marriage?" Tasha asked after a few moments.

"Well, they've been best friends since kindergarten so they're very comfortable around each other. I think the only thing that changed was the fact that they both realize they love each other. Other than that, nothing will have changed and they're probably still doing the same old routine."

Tasha giggled and nodded. "You're probably right. They seem to match perfectly no matter which way you turn them. Lissa could be a complete bitch and Rose would stand by her side. Rose could be a wimpy crybaby that's afraid of everything and Lissa would protect and defend her. They were made for each other."

Dimitri nodded and continued eating his breakfast as Tasha stood and took her plate to the sink. She returned to the table and gave Dimitri a kiss.

"Thank you for choosing me." She said to him.

"It was like I had no choice." He replied, kissing her back.


	8. Rose and Lissa's Future

Rose and Lissa

"Thank you so much, Christian." Rose told him as she watched Lissa move around slowly in order to avoid hitting her stomach.

"Hey, if I can help progress a royal family, then I'll do whatever I can." Christian replied, also watching Lissa. Rose was making breakfast since she'd been taking cooking lessons and Lissa was thinking about what color the nursery should be.

"What color do you think, Christian?" Lissa asked, looking over at their guest. Christian and his girlfriend, Viktorya were staying with Lissa and Rose while their house was being fumigated.

"I think it should be green." He replied.

"Why green?" Lissa asked.

"Because it's Rose's favorite color and the color of your eyes. So your baby will feel protected either way."

Rose nodded to him. "He's got a point, Liss."

Lissa rolled her eyes with a smile. "What would you consider to be a good name?" she asked.

"Well, we won't be able to pick a name until we know what it is." Rose pointed out.

"But we won't know until it's born." Lissa countered.

"It wasn't my idea to wait until it was born to find out." Rose joked, making Lissa blush.

"Yeah well, you agreed to it."

"Only because you kept going on and on about it." Rose laughed, watching as Lissa's blush darkened.

Lissa shrugged and dropped the conversation, starting a new one. "How are you and Tory doing, Chrissy?"

Christian sighed at the nickname. "We're doing fine. She's getting moodier by the day and she barely wakes up anymore."

Lissa cocked her head in concern. "Well, maybe she's sick." She suggested.

"Maybe." Christian agreed halfheartedly.

"Are you two planning on making it official anytime soon?" Rose asked.

"The engagement?" Christian asked to which Rose nodded. "We don't know yet. Aunt Tasha still hasn't told us what She and Dimitri think of it."

Lissa felt a flash of guilt at the look of pain that swept across Rose's face. She looked down at the table and wouldn't meet either eye of the other two.

"Liss?"

Lissa shook her head and sighed. "I'm sorry."

Rose reached across the table and lifted Lissa's chin. "It wasn't your fault." Rose told her.

"But it was still me."

"No, it was someone acting as you. It's fine now because Dimitri's got Tanya and I have you."

Lissa nodded, but her frown stayed. Just then, there were footsteps on the stairs and everyone turned to see Christian's girlfriend, Viktorya walking slowly down the stairs. "Tory?" Christian asked slowly.

She glanced up, her red curls falling in her eyes a bit as she smiled. "Good morning Christian." She said hoarsely, her high soprano a bit deeper than normal.

"Are you hungry?" Rose asked, trying to keep her voice as light as possible so as not to set off Viktorya's mood swings; if Tory had a sudden mood swing, it would trigger Lissa's mood swing and that's the last thing any of them needed.

"Famished." Tory nodded. Rose stood to get Tory something to eat as Lissa cleared a space on the table for the redhead.

"So how are you feeling?" Lissa asked softly.

"I, uh, well there have been instances where I've felt sick to my stomach, but nothing too severe." Lissa nodded and said nothing more.

Rose brought over a plate of food for Viktorya and sat down next to Lissa again. "Are you pregnant?" the Guardian asked.

Viktorya looked up at her with a small flash of fear in her eyes. "How can you tell?" she asked softly.

"Mood swings, nausea, you're tearing up your food. It's the same thing Liss is going through. I can't wait to find out if it's a girl or a boy." She shot a wink at Lissa who smiled.

"Well, we'll just have to add another member to the family." Lissa said.

"Yeah," Rose whispered. "Our big happy family." She looked around at Christian and Viktorya before her eyes landed on Lissa and she grinned, leaning over to snag a quick kiss.

"Our love…" Rose murmured.

"…was compulsion." Lissa finished.


End file.
